Finding out someone you love and care for has cancer, and an
aggressive terminal type of cancer like mesothelioma especially, is
devastating. There are many ways that family members can help cancer patients.
If you have a parent, sibling, spouse, or other loved one with a mesothelioma
diagnosis, the journey ahead will not be easy, but you have the opportunity to
make it better for them.
Coping with a
Mesothelioma Diagnosis
Getting the news that someone you care about has
mesothelioma is shocking. This is the type of cancer that is usually triggered
by exposure to asbestos, and it often doesn’t develop until decades later. Your
loved one may have worked around asbestos years ago. Mesothelioma is also an
aggressive cancer that can’t typically be cured.
Helping
your loved one cope with this, and finding a way to process it for yourself
is important. Assure them you will be there throughout the process, lending
support, practical assistance, and whatever else they need. Declarations of
support at this early stage can be so helpful.
Helping with
Treatment, Financial Decisions, and Other Practical Issues
Very soon after a diagnosis of mesothelioma, you and your
loved one will have to start making important practical decisions. These
include choosing
specialists and treatment plans, deciding if legal action is necessary,
figuring out how to cover associated expenses, making travel plans for care,
and even just deciding how to tell other people.
The person diagnosed with cancer has the ultimate
responsibility for making these decisions, but imagine how stressful it is when
also fighting this disease. Be a sounding board, gather information, talk to
the medical team, and take whatever other steps will remove some of the stress
and pressure of making these choices.
Providing Emotional
Support
Practical support is necessary, but so is emotional
support. When your loved one needs to talk about how all this feels, about
fears and stresses, just be there to listen. You can also help them find
support groups or mental health services. Also consider recommending
alternative practices, things like massage therapy and meditation, that can
provide relief from stress, fear, and anxiety.
Bring in Extra Help
if Needed
As the cancer progresses your loved one may need more
physical and healthcare support than you can provide. For instance, they may
need assistance bathing, going to the bathroom, or taking medications. If you
don’t feel like you can provide this type of support, or if you can’t be there
24 hours a day, it’s important to recruit more help. You may even want to
consider a healthcare professional, like a home aid, for extra support and the
times when you have to be out.
Know When to Take a
Break
Caregiving duties can take a serious toll, especially when
you are a family member rather than a professional caring for a patient. The emotional,
physical, and even financial burdens can be big. All caregivers must take care
of themselves too, for their own sakes and to be able to continue providing
good care for the patient.
Bring in a professional to lend a hand, ask another family
member to take over some of the duties, and take time off from being a
caregiver. Take time for yourself to recharge and relax, so you can go back to
your loved one feeling strong. If you need more help than time off provides,
consider joining a support group for caregivers or seeing a therapist.
Caring for a loved one with mesothelioma is a challenging
task, but for many people in this role there is no choice. You love someone who
is suffering, and you want to be there to help. Provide emotional support and
practical assistance, but also take care of your own needs.
